Thoughts

I have a very powerful imagination. Sometimes this power is used for good and others times...not so much. I like too look at things and give them a story or a history. If nothing, they at least have a name. Names seem to make things more real. I like real things.

The down side to this is also the fact that I am extremely emotional. Sometimes those emotions get tangled up in the stories that I creat for myself and they bleed into the reality of my life. People sometimes suffer for this. I know my friends have.

This is probably the worst way to apologize, but it's what I have. You see, I have apologized so many times I'm fairly certain my words have very little weight. But, I am sorry. I am so sorry that I dragged my friends into real emotions that I created into monsters. I was feeling them, this is no lie, I felt them it's true, but I threw them at my friends in hopes that they could make them better for me. There is one friend in particular I did this to. They know who they are.

I am so sorry I dragged you down to my silly bowl of emotions. It's how I organize things. And as a good friend you tried to experience them with me, to help me understand them better. I promptly drowned you in them. I crushed you so completely that you could recive little to no breath at all. I took the wonderful understanding friendship that have and I beat it to a pulp in the hopes of trying to find a better me. That was terrible of me. I am so sorry I took your choices away. This was never my intention as I'm sure you well know, but it's what I did. I am a needy person. But, I'm getting help, and coming to a better and more independent place.

I know my words are pointless, but I would love to prove it if you would give me the chance. I can be better, and I feel as if I'm almost there.